I can’t do this anymore. I can’t control the urges anymore. I can’t take the pain. The pressure. The abuse. I feel disgusting.
Just realized I have enough money saved up that I could runaway to almost anywhere in the US. The real question is do I have the guts. And the answer is no.
I wish you tried as hard to spend time with me like you do with him… I’m your girlfriend, not him. You say you love me, but you don’t show it. I live with you and still he see’s you more than I do. I miss you. I just want you around…
I have never felt so worthless and disposable…. I have also never wanted to sink into my past more than I do right now. I can hear the blade calling my name again. Not juat calling. No, screaming and begging me to run to it. To let it take care of my pain. And you know what, I might just sprint the distance…
It’s sad when you realize you don’t really have any friends because even when you are in a room full of people, no one notices when you sit in the corner by yourself.
Since you say you love me more than anything in this world, you would think that you would spend even a little bit of time with me. But no. You spend all your time hanging out with everyone else BUT me. And it kills me a little inside everytime.
I’m tired. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. And spiritually. I’m tired of feeling like no one listens to me. I’m tired of feeling like no one cares. I’m just tired.